I am not a good person. I am not ambitious. I am satisfied by minimum amount of things. I do not have an appetite for monetary growth. However, I do believe in spiritual growth. Small amounts of happiness in small things are sufficient for me. I do not feel the need to prove myself to the world. In other words or we can say the meaning of this in modern times is that I am lazy, I do not want to take responsibility, I do not want to grow in life. I am not going to justify my nature to society or anybody. This is how I am.
But yes I am also not going to be a hindrance in your growth whatsoever it is.
I was even ready to marry a girl who was unable to speak and hear. Because those things doesn't matter to me. All that mattered to me is the good nature of a person.
Why do I feel like that whatever I have written above is negative in some way?? Am I really a bad, lazy and irresponsible person or living in this competitive society has made me think about myself like this?
I have nothing against anyone. I am happy by myself all the time. Then why does it feel negative to me all the time? Is it because I am being constantly judged by the society for behaving in this peculiar way? Or is it because the society feels threatened by my peculiar behavior? But, I am just a normal person who has no effect or influence on other person's life whatsoever. Why does society want me to behave in a particular way? Is it because it suits their ego or meet their definition of living a life?? It might also be because some people might see some potential in me to do something good with my life. What does doing something good with life means? Maybe, lots of money? Lots of fame? Or maybe doing something good for the society? or maybe being inspiration for others?
Money and fame does not interest me. But the other 2 points answers itself. When a person lives a normal life, means they are focused on doing their work honestly, they are doing good for the society and they are being inspiration to others.
Doing good for society does not mean that you have to feed the poor, do charity or some social work etc. In my opinion living an honest life and just being good to others, in itself, benefits the society. It also inspire others around you to live such an honest life.
So, at last, I see no point in doubting myself and feel negative about my unique behavior. In fact, after contemplating and writing openly about my thoughts, it has cleared the clouds of my mind.
